What Happens When You Thank Your Setback

I've always been drawn to self-help books. They were my go-to when I was trying to figure out all the stuff we're all trying to navigate in life. I found authors who seemed tapped into that "thing" I desperately wanted to find. In many ways, I was jealous they figured out how the world worked before I did. I was playing catch-up, which was fine, but like everyone, I wanted to feel better right now without putting in all the work. After all, it's supposed to be easy, right?

After my diagnosis, I found myself at a crossroads. A decision needed to be made consciously. This setback wasn't going away. There was no easy answer, and it was going to take a different approach. That's when I sat down with myself and had the "real" conversation.

It was during that moment I decided it was time to figure out what I could contribute to this world to help other people like me. The best part I realized was that they didn't have to be people going through cancer. Cancer just happened to be the thing I was going through right now. But somebody else is going through something equally tough for them. How could I take the lessons I'd been learning and apply them to people going through normal life stuff?

Most of these things I've figured out? The road isn't easy, and it usually starts with a question.

What got me into writing and working on books was wondering: What would happen if I pretended I was a kid again, forgot I was an adult, and leaned into my imagination? I started creating the stories I'd carried around my whole life. The ones that helped other kids like me who felt out of place find that their "weird" was okay.

So what would the question be this time?

What emerged was an understanding that maybe I should be grateful for this.

Maybe the greatest lesson wasn't buried underneath some uncharted world of pain at the surface level. The disappointment was there. Maybe that was as far as I needed to look. What would happen if I was actually grateful for it? Could thanking this setback be the thing that would actually set me free and get me on the path of healing? Not only myself, but possibly help other people heal themselves as well?

This was a big question. So I started writing. Not things I wanted, but things that had been hanging around far too long. Instead of ignoring them, I acknowledged them and thanked them for being there. Then I spun the story around, saw what role I had played in it, and thanked that as well.

I think we all have a tendency to want to run from the things we find embarrassing, self-sabotaging, or even shameful. I spent a lifetime doing that. I get it.

But here's what I never expected from thanking my setback.

I never expected to find so many people who would understand and feel the same way I did.

I'm not afraid to admit when I was first diagnosed, I did everything I could to avoid talking to other brain cancer patients. It was almost as if I was afraid I would catch their story and their story would become my story. I wanted to protect myself because I wanted nothing more than to live.

I still want nothing more than to live. But I would say this past month in September has opened my eyes to how much true connection changes us. How gratitude for the things that go wrong in our lives opens doors we didn't know existed.

It all began by thanking my setback.

It opened doors to so many unseen possibilities. For the past month, I've connected with thousands of people. It started with being the keynote speaker for the 2025 ABTA National Conference. Then the next week, presenting to the leaders of OhioHealth who are making a difference in their communities by being patient-focused and providing hope and leadership for patients looking to them for direction in their healing.

September was capped off by spending time presenting at a place near and dear to my heart: The Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center, talking to the APPs. These aren't just future leaders. They are the glue that holds it all together. They are the humanity and source of hope that patients find when a grief bomb has been dropped on their lap. In my opinion, they are the difference makers.

It's amazing to me that by sharing my struggles, I've been recognized by people around the globe for the things I write, discuss, and the struggles I've been through. This has been the bridge out of so many spirals I've experienced over the past four years.

You may read this and think thanking the thing that feels like it's breaking you down isn't the right way to go. What I would say is you have to trust me. It's not breaking you down. It's actually breaking you open to become that thing you've secretly wanted to be but maybe were too afraid to tell other people.

It will set you free and unleash the inner creator you are. What's waiting to evolve from you are all the things you've kept to yourself. You'll find that when you begin to share them, they become a light for so many people. And it was all just from you being yourself.

Hope isn't just a feeling. It's a strategy that will transform everything in your life. But it does begin with you acknowledging the setback and being grateful for it.

I'm very excited for what the future holds, not only for myself but for you. Once we all learn to embrace our setbacks instead of run from them, we start making a personal commitment with our minds and hearts to create the world we want. It's amazing how it'll change everything in your life.

I know because I'm proof of it.

Thank you for being part of my story. I hope if I've done anything for you, it's helped you take one step further down the path of who you're becoming.

Because it's pretty amazing.