When Your Body Becomes a Stranger
I'm not here to prove anything. I'm here to build trust with myself.
Whether you're new to the things I share or you've been following for a while, it's probably not a far stretch to understand that this work of surviving isn't easy. When my Grade 4 Glioblastoma diagnosis was handed down four years ago, it was a gut punch like nothing I'd ever felt before.
In that process, I knew I was going to have to figure out a way out. And when I started to do that, it felt very lonely. There weren't a lot of places to turn to.
This is where I figured out what hope really meant. I was looking for a spark to show me there was a path out.
Looking back now, I never would have guessed that the way out was to thank the setback for what it was doing for me. Because at the end of the day, we really don't want to believe that our setback is actually a setup.
It's one of those hindsight things that we look back on and go, "Ah, yes! That's what I was looking for.
The Question That Changes Everything
So you may ask yourself: What good is there in thanking something that has been so terrible?
That's a great question. What it does is break down all the barriers you've built up around your problems as a way to deflect your fear and protect yourself from facing things that could be scary.
For a lot of us, we find shame in not getting things right. For me, at least in the beginning, I felt shame that my body was letting me down because I'd worked so hard to right a lot of the things I felt had gone wrong.
I would argue that even the strongest of us with the best mindsets still get kicked pretty hard by setbacks. It's hard to rebound, regardless of what people want to say, because you really don't know until you've walked this path.
For me, thanking my setback allowed me to rebuild. It allowed me to see that I could dig really deep inside myself. And the further down I dug, the more I realized that was where I was going to find the light that would help other people in the same situation.
The H.O.P.E. Algorithm in Action
Here's how thanking setbacks transforms us through the H.O.P.E. Algorithm:
HYPER-AWARE • Recognize that setbacks reveal patterns you couldn't see before • Notice the difference between what's happening TO you versus THROUGH you • Acknowledge that your struggle might be someone else's missing puzzle piece • Observe how shame keeps you stuck while gratitude sets you free
OPEN-HEARTED • Accept that your body isn't betraying you, it's teaching you • Embrace vulnerability as the bridge between hopeless and hopeful • Allow yourself to feel grateful for terrible things without minimizing their impact • Open to the possibility that your pain has purpose
PERSISTENT • Keep showing up even when setbacks feel like the end of the story • Persist in looking for light in the deepest, darkest places • Continue sharing your struggle, knowing it builds bridges for others • Remember that persistence includes thanking what you want to curse
EMPOWERING • Give yourself permission to find meaning in meaningless suffering • Recognize that your transformation empowers others to transform • Choose to see setbacks as setups without toxic positivity • Believe that your one-in-ten chance matters to the nine who need hope
Thanking my setback allowed me to set myself free. I stopped holding myself back. I stopped hating on myself so much and started to find a path back to myself and the version of me I was looking for.
Getting Lost to Find Your Way
It's like getting lost in the woods. They tell you to stop walking because you're just going to walk in circles. Stay put, and people will find you.
That's what it felt like for me, and it continues to. I've had quite a few setbacks recently, which sucks. But it's allowed me to continue moving forward with a stronger mission to help shine a light on this struggle.
Because I know there are other people out there like me, just trying to figure out how to get back to themselves.
The truth is, I really don't know all the answers. All I really know is that I have to share what I've been through. Because in sharing that, I'm showing there is a path.
It's not because something is happening TO you. It's because something is going THROUGH you. It's trying to emerge through you. It's showing you possibilities in a mountain of impossibilities.
The Mirror Moment
Most of us get blinded by the idea that doing something is impossible, so we forget to look around. We don't look back at all the stuff we've overcome and show ourselves that we can do hard things.
For so many of us, we sit and wait for some savior to show up and show us what's possible. We overlook the most obvious answer, which is right in front of us.
Just go find the nearest mirror and look. Because it's you.
You are an amazing creator of this world. We're all able to take what looks like reality and twist the illusion into fitting a reality we're wanting.
Initially, I was given a seven-month survival window. I'm now over four years, which with a quick search is roughly one in ten. Not great odds, but I firmly believe it was through a razor's edge of hope and due diligence that I continue to not only survive but thrive.
Hope isn't a passive wish—it's a strategy.
The Bridge Between Hopeless and Hopeful
I used to think I needed to put strength forward first. But as I've started sharing more of the struggles, I've realized that it's in sharing the struggles that brings the common bonds between us. It's the bridge that builds the gap between hopeless and hopeful.
Each one of us has our challenges. You have your version of the GBM that you deal with every day. That doesn't mean mine is better than yours or that comparison is the way we should go. It just means different things are hard for each of us, and we all have to find our way around it.
Look up right now and realize that every single person around you is dealing with their own version of something crappy. The degree of which you have no clue. But through kindness and compassion, realizing you've also gone through hard things, a simple smile or compliment to that person can change their day and yours.
Because remember, we all have setbacks. The thing that set you back might be somebody else's puzzle piece they're looking for to move forward in their lives.
Your One-in-Ten Chance Matters
I am so grateful for that one-in-ten chance. I never take it for granted anymore because I realize that sharing the struggle, thanking my setback, and reaching out to others actually shows the light I've been looking for between hopeless and hopeful.
From losing trust in my body to learning how to trust my body again.
Impossible is optional. But gratitude for the journey, including the detours that nearly broke you? That's essential.
What setback in your life is waiting for a thank-you note? What if that very thing you're fighting is actually the thing trying to set you free?
Your struggle isn't just your story. It's someone else's hope.
About the Author: Jason Tharp is a brain cancer survivor, keynote speaker, and founder of the Beyond Hope Project. Known as "The Hope Guy," Jason helps individuals transform impossible circumstances into opportunities for growth. After surviving Grade 4 Glioblastoma against a seven-month prognosis, he developed the H.O.P.E. Algorithm to guide others toward their own transformation. Learn more at beyondhopeproject.com and jasontharp.com.
